Why don't Grebel girls put out? - Grebel Master Debater
Dear Master debater: I think someone needs a lesson in respect! Such a question tells me that your mind is in one location, and one location only: the gutter. Get out of it, and realize that we women are human beings with emotions. And feelings. Typical, disgusting man... From Abby! I really like hanging out with a Grebel boy, and want to know if he feels the same way. I don't want to straight up ask him, but am also finding him really hard to read. What should I do??? - Wondering Dear wondering: You don't want to straight up ask him, but that's exactly what you need to do. Let me tell you something about men: they don't know anything! They don't know what they're feeling a lot of the time, they don't know that women are the superior gender, and they don't even know left from right without making an 'L' with their left hand. Since he doesn't know anything, he won't verbalize complete thoughts or anything similar to them. Ask him with easy, yes/no questions, so that he doesn't get lost. Who knows, maybe he still will.... |
I am thinking about coming out of the closet but I'm worried my friends will think I'm not fashionable enough. What do I do? - Stereotypes Suck
Dear stereotypes suck: I think you should do what you want to do. If you come out a bit unfashionable, those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. I wish you luck in your attire choices. -Abby I'm really interested in this guy, I won't say who he is (but I can say he's Aaron Neufeld's room mate), and I want to ask him out. Unfortunately, I'm scared of all the competition! What should I do? - Gunning for Gibo Dear gunning for Gibo: I'm having a bit of trouble finding out who your crush is. Perhaps if you were a bit more specific in your next question? In general though, you should just approach the guy! Explicitly tell him you think he's hot, and it's easy sailing from there. Brush your hands along his neck while he's sitting in his desk chair. Men respond to physical touch like boa constrictors respond to a helpless goat. It's a great simile. Good luck! |
What should I get for her birthday?? - Pressure to Present
Dear pressure to present: This is always a tough question that guys ask. The key here is to get something sentimental rather than practical. You don't want to buy winter tires for her car, you'll want to buy a blanket with a cute puppy or kitten on it (depends on if she's a dog or cat person). Think back to your happiest memory with her. Then buy something which could remind both of you of that time. THAT's the key into a woman's heart. |
Who is Abby!?
It has come to my attention that my audience is curious as to my true identity. The editors have been getting constant queries as to who I am. So while answering your questions this past week, I thought of something.
Let's play a game. In each issue for the rest of the school year, beginning with this one, I will be giving a clue as to my true identity. With each issue, you'll be a bit closer to finding out who I am.
If you think you know who I am, you can email me personally, at [email protected], with your reasoning clearly explained. The first to guess me properly will receive a special prize. Here's the catch: each resident is allowed one submission throughout the school year. If you guess incorrectly, you're out of the competition.
Rule change: Submissions are collected and recorded. No one is told if they are correct or not. At the end of next term, there will be a prize to the first person who guess correctly.
This contest is not open to any resident or associate who already knows who I am. I know who you all are.
Discretion is requested here: if you already know my identity, or if you find out along the way, please keep it a secret. We want to have a fun time.
This week's WHO IS ABBY clue:
-I am an upper year (and I'm NOT one of the editors).
Don't worry, clues will get more specific as time goes on.
Good luck! Have fun!
Let's play a game. In each issue for the rest of the school year, beginning with this one, I will be giving a clue as to my true identity. With each issue, you'll be a bit closer to finding out who I am.
If you think you know who I am, you can email me personally, at [email protected], with your reasoning clearly explained. The first to guess me properly will receive a special prize. Here's the catch: each resident is allowed one submission throughout the school year. If you guess incorrectly, you're out of the competition.
Rule change: Submissions are collected and recorded. No one is told if they are correct or not. At the end of next term, there will be a prize to the first person who guess correctly.
This contest is not open to any resident or associate who already knows who I am. I know who you all are.
Discretion is requested here: if you already know my identity, or if you find out along the way, please keep it a secret. We want to have a fun time.
This week's WHO IS ABBY clue:
-I am an upper year (and I'm NOT one of the editors).
Don't worry, clues will get more specific as time goes on.
Good luck! Have fun!